I have been misused by many many many men....

I laugh at this EVERY SINGLE TIME I hear it....BUT?

 Click here~~~~> How I feel about a LOT of people on facebook. Does this make me a whore?

While most of my friends were having kids, or getting married, (or subsequently divorced and having support/custody battles)...I? Was drinking, dancing, and...well, let's just say I was a bit of a wild child in my 20's. I pretty much did what I wanted, when I wanted, how I wanted. No one was gonna put me in a box...so I just blew on through every phase of early adulthood without honestly EVER conquering a single one.  The beauty of that?
It was all about me.

All day....
Every day....

And it was awesome....

(Really? Judgement? Puh-lease....It's illegal here...)

This video could pretty much be aimed RIGHT AT ME....(except the obvious male references)
I was young, I was just cute enough to get all the attention (for good or bad) that I could possibly want. If I drank enough, I was ten foot tall and bulletproof...and the hottest thing in the bar.... It's true. I was there.

The self-centered, narcissistic stage that plagues most teenagers took over a decade beyond my 20th birthday to pass into being a full blown adult (still a bit self-centered and narcissistic, but hey...who's perfect?). Meaning, if I screwed up - someone else would fix it. If I didn't like where I was - I moved (lease be damned!). Every three months or so (yes, it was almost THAT predictable) I would change jobs, men, living situations... It was exhausting for those around me. For me? Everything I owned fit neatly in my car. I didn't necessarily unpack.
Ever.
I was that friend that just needed a couch for a night to crash and ended up there for a while. My family started asking guys I dated if they would still be around for the holidays (even if they met them in November...it depended on where in the 3 month rolling cycle I was). I don't even remember parts of my 20's. Seriously. Like entire time frames wiped from the hard drive in my head (and it does have Random Access Memory) like I was asleep through weeks of activity.
I was quite literally the perfect bachelorette. I didn't cook, I didn't clean, I didn't bring anything productive to the table. The up side was, I was a cheap date... (as an ex once told me, I didn't need a rich man, Taco Bell costs the same no matter who's buying it)

Not that I'm PROUD of those things.....

......not that I'm particularly ashamed of them either.

Eventually that phase passed.

I just wish I had figured out this disposable income thing earlier (like back when I would have used it for rent....Ok, I'm lying. For cover charges? Yeah, probably that. Obviously, with coin beer you didn't HAVE to have much money in those days). I mean, being able to just spend $2500 on new appliances so they'll be prettier? Sheesh. I never thought of that. By no means are we rich, but we've got good money coming in and we're irresponsible. THAT is how we roll these days. Like we can't possibly save a dime, something horrible will go wrong if we have an emergency stash and are suddenly equipped with good financial behavior.
Yeah. I laughed at that part too...

Maybe it's just meant to be this simple. You KNOW I haven't tried THAT hard to avoid the pitfalls of slovenly behavior (some days I don't actually get dressed at ALL). I guess we'll just keep trekking along, blowing our money on wants rather than needs...and we'll always make it through.
Sometimes love IS enough...(as long as you marry someone who is just as horrible with money as you are. That way, even if you're poor...who do you blame?)

Ok. I guess there's nothing left but to start....

I have a blog...actually I have two of them. They depict my life. My world as it is... THIS blog? Has no purpose other than entertainment. The semi-anonymity of not telling anyone who I am, although I know a few people who would have no trouble figuring it out if they found me...(soup is kinda my thing...but I'll explain what soup is, and how it ACTUALLY works at another time...)
I mean, who doesn't want to follow a 40 year old anxiety sufferer who is quitting smoking and dieting and working out 3-5 times a week for the first time in her life ALL while dealing with the heavy shit life is handing her... (and no exaggeration, I got some heavy shit going on)... Internationally known (...well, a couple of my friends from school live in other countries now, doesn't that count?) FABULOUS....(in a way that only the people who have no regard for fashion can be!) and DRIVEN (to madness most days) to change.
Honestly, I live a life of tremendous blessings. But also of limited, er...what would you call it....ummm...?
Excitement? No. I don't bore easily, I'm a reader.
Adventure? Not really, it's an adventure every time I go to the gym...that's enough for me these days.

I have plenty of REAL things to complain/whine/bitch about in my real world...but that's not what this is about. THIS is my one place to actually be pretentious. As if the perky people at Starbucks making me stabby the ONE day a week I drag my ass out to get a mocha is the pinnacle of all that is wrong with my life. No, it's not. But that's part of the charm of this page. It's where the REALITY isn't the point. It's the fabulous, narcissistic, neurotic, snarky, obsessive compulsive, random, useless place that I can air all my ridiculous, pointless crap. DIG?
Let's just say creativity...maybe that sums it up. It's all and nothing at once. No REAL reason to complain, but I'm a whiner nonetheless. So stick around and watch me let loose my inner narcissist, because around here? It's really ALL about me...